Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
