they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize