mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
