there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
