was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
