and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
