I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
My day in three words: secret purse cake
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
