3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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