Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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