Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
