I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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