He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
this will be a night to untag.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
My penis needs a shock collar
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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