I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She bit a glass in half.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Drake has all the answers
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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