Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
