you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
