i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Randomize