It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
