Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
