THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
