pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize