Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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