Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
