whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
