So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
