come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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