I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Panties = found
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
