so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
