Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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