That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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