I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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