At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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