I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
