Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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