Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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