Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
i think im in europe. pls send help
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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