so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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