3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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