found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
as a side note pls kill me
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