Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize