just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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