it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
