This show inspires me to have sex in space
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
