I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
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