So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
