Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
