Non-Jews are for practice
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
