he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
