I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
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