Sry I called you an 8
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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