while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I need water and some morals
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
