i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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