I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
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